Second Chances: Missing The Strike, But Converting The Spare
Bowling, shooting baskets, my diet, and Judaism. What do these things have in common? The possibility of a second chance.
I’ll let you in on a secret – I love bowling, and I’m pretty good at it. When I was growing up, bowling was a major part of my life. Long before I became Shomer Shabbat, I spent many a Saturday afternoon at the bowling alley. The afternoon, yes, because we went to shul in the morning. One of the best features of bowling is the second ball. Sure, nothing beats a strike, but a spare is still pretty good. Since childhood, and watching my own children bowl, I have seen my share of gutter balls converted to spares, thanks to the blessing of the second ball.
Shooting baskets is not the same as playing a real game, and the rules are different. One of the features of shooting around with friends is the concept of the second shot. Here’s how it works. If a player sinks her practice shot, the protocol is to return the ball to her and she keeps shooting until she misses. But if the player misses his first shot, he still gets to shoot one more time. That’s one of the great unwritten rules – giving the one who fails one more try to succeed.
Then there’s my diet. Five years ago, anticipating my 40th birthday, I joined Weight Watchers and lost 25 pounds. I swore to myself that I would keep the weight off. Yes, I gained back five pounds, but no big deal, right? But then I gained a little more, and then still, a little more. So now, I’m starting over. At first I was embarrassed to be back at Weight Watchers, but really I’m grateful for the second chance, and I’m making the most of it. Getting a second chance is one of the best features of Judaism. Sure, we should all try to get it right the first time. But when we fail, the answer is not to give up, but rather to try again. This is a central theme of the recent High Holy Days, but teshuvah, or “sincere change,” is available every day of the year.
Ask yourself—am I doing enough to help my family, my synagogue, my community, my brothers and sisters in Israel? Do I show enough gratitude to God, respect to my parents, compassion to the needy? Have I truly learned to refrain from speaking inappropriately? Have I really tried to give up the forbidden activities of Shabbat and/or the forbidden foods of Kashrut?
And when we answer “no” to some or all of these questions, it does not mean we have failed. We fail only if we stop trying to answer “yes.” Now is the time to “roll the second ball,” to “take another shot,” to use the God-given opportunity to try once more to improve the quality and spirit of our lives and the lives of our children.
